The Plush Files
by Rei-sama1525
Summary: The plushies we all know are those cute, cuddy little dolls, right? WRONG! Come take a look at the honourable Reisama's The Plush Files to see what really happens behind closed doors.The truth is out there.


Disclaimer: Rei-sama does not own any animes/plushies recorded in these files. But one day, when she takes over the world, she will!

Authors Note: I came up with these stories and this topic off the top of my head one day while talking about plushies with my fellow anime friends. If anyone else has anything similar to this idea and submitted before me, I apologize much in advance! I tried to make these files as original as I could so no one could say I "stole" their idea.

**The Plush Files**

Rei-sama's Introduction

I, Rei, have dedicated my whole life to finding the genuine "truth behind truths" of the plushies of this world. Do they do unspeakable things while we're not looking? What exactly are these unspeakable things? When do they do these things? What is there motive? How do they find ways to pull off these amazing stunts that no ordinary stuffed bear can do? (Even though those bears are pretty crazy themselves) You, the readers, will hear the unspeakable stories that I learn while on my dangerous journey for the "truth" of the plushie.

This is "The Plush Files".

The truth is out there.

-Rei

Truth One: Death to the 16 Year Old! Long Live the Lord!

I, Rei-sama, have just found the first "truth" to be recorded. There he was, sitting there on the 13 year olds bed. He looked so innocent at first, on top of the pink pillow, give or take the fact that he was sitting on top of InuYasha. The same straight stare that only he could make. With those dazzling, golden eyes… But enough with my fantasies. Have we figured out who this great lord is yet? Yes, it was the all mighty Sesshomaru-sama!

Well, about three minutes after the 13-year-old left the room, he started tapping. Yes,_ tapping_, with his finger! Then he stood up. He stood up, still on top of InuYasha, stomping on his face to make a point. The InuYasha plushie groaned, his face now buried deeper into the pink pillow. I take it InuYasha was used to this pillow-smashing technique. .

Well, the plush suddenly made this really angry face. It called out in a little voice that, dare I say, was super kawaii. "Jaken!" A squeaky and NOT so kawaii voice replied "Yes, milord!" Then, and I swear when I say this, a Jaken plushie came scampering out from behind the dresser! It somehow found a way to kneel down to its lord, obviously shaking in fear of its life.

Sesshomaru said in a still kawaii but most serious voice he could make "We strike now." "Right this second, milord!" Jaken asked, surprised. "Yes, while the two female giants and one male giant are out." He stated. I supposed he was referring to humans. Poor plush, I thought.

"Oh, that's right, milord! The other female still lies sleeping in her room!" Jaken spoke. I wondered what sort of plot they could be thinking up. I watched in amazement (and amusement) as Jaken struggled to open the door that equaled maybe 50 Jaken plushies. But, nonetheless, he had opened the door. The two scurried out into a hallway, heading straight for another room.

Now, I had to rush to the other side of the house, finding the other window that led to the room where the two had marched into, so I did not see their entrance. But what I did see was Sesshomaru on top of a 15 year old girl, shoving his fuzzy little plush sword into the girls' eye. She screamed out of fear and pain as her eyeball was repeatedly stabbed with a three inch, fuzzy sword. Jaken was gnawing at the poor girl's ankle.

With one last, final blow, Sesshomaru pulled out a steak knife. Where he got this weapon, I don't know. He jabbed it through the girl's heart. She screamed, and then fell limp.

At this time, I had to throw up, but I did hear a triumphant "TAKE THAT, WEAK HUMAN!" After recovering from a weak stomach, I peeked again through the window. Again, I had to walk around the house. But the walk was worth while.As I peeked through the 13 year old girl's window once again, I saw an interesting sight. InuYasha and Kagome were by the closet, making out. I saw Jaken and Sesshomaru stare in horror. I was hysterical laughing. I managed to get pictures of Kagome and InuYasha, until I didn't realize that Jaken had seen me.

It seems that an anonymous call was sent to the police station stating that there was someone attempting to rob the young girl's room. I was caught and arrested, and tried to explain "The Plush Files" to the police. I was released, but said to be insane. I must be more careful next time!

Luckily, I was released from the Police Station before they found the dead 16 year old girl. Thankfully, since plushies don't have fingerprints, and Sesshomaru had placed the steak knife in the girls hand, it was claimed to be suicide. I'm thankful I didn't have to explain how a Sesshomaru and Jaken plushie murdered a sixteen year old girl, ha-ha.

Authors Note: How'd you all like it? I tried my best at a funny attempt at my first ever fanfic to be posted! I'm sort of new to the fanfiction idea, so please treat me kindly in my best attempt to make a funny story! Arigoto Gozaimas! (Thank you very much!)

Truth Two: Lights! Camera! Aaya!

Now, this second truth I stumbled upon on accident. My Master's granddaughter, Laura, had won tickets to see a Sesame Street show live one Saturday. Being as I had nothing to do that Saturday (and since little Laura begged me to go), I went with her. We got front row seats at this HUGE, and I mean HUGE Theater.

I was quietly reading Fruits Basket number 13 for the eight hundredth time (and counting) when the lights dimmed. Cursing under my breath, I put the book away and was forced to turn my attention to the show. Laura squirmed onto my lap, cutting off my view to only one of the little fake apartment buildings with a cut out window.

The show started, and Laura cheered and clapped as the famous Big Bird came onto the stage. I was fine with looking at the apartment building, since Big Bird always did make me nervous.

For ten minutes of the show, I just stared at the window. No reason, besides the fact that I thought the little purple curtains with sunflowers on them was pretty cute. Then, out from behind the window, I saw a little, big headed figure's silhouette from inside the building. "Another puppet?" was my first guess. But then, though I know no one else noticed, the tiny body popped out its head from the curtains.

"DEAR GOD!" I yelped, getting a few stares and a very unhappy Laura glaring at me for disrupting her show. There, in the window, was Ayame Sohma! Yes, THAT Ayame! He was wearing a purple dress-looking thing, similar to what he was wearing on the cover of Fruits Basket #9. He also had a purple and silver boa over his shoulders, with black sunglasses on, too.

He was striking dashing poses. Some children noticed and started laughing. I quick pulled out my camera-phone (I didn't have my professional camera with me) and took dozens of pictures. This plushie was crazy! He was going to be seen! But this benefited me! Now I could get back at those police men for calling crazy during the "burglary" incident.

Anyway, I suppose the directors didn't realize this all, even when Aaya nearly fell out of the window. But he was saved from total humiliation by a Shigure plushie and a Hatori plushie, who grabbed one of his legs and dragged him out of the window and back into the room of the apartment. There were little squeals and yells barely audible from the sound of Elmo singing with the rest of the cast. No doubt Hatori was scolding Aaya for running away, and Shigure whimpering over his almost-lost friend.

The lights on the stage dimmed, and the cast took a bow. While trying to get one last picture of the plushies, Laura jumped up and started clapping and yelling and cheering with the rest of the kids.

To my demise, I had clicked the "delete all photos" button. In my anger I almost jumped up, nearly making Laura fall off my legs. I grabbed her, forcing her to sit instead of stand, where once again she pouted and glared. The cast left the stage. I cried. All my proof! Gone!

Laura wiped my tears and told me "Don't worry; you can see Big Bird next time we come!" I hugged her. What a sweet, sweet child she was.

When Master Jean came to pick us up, she asked "So, how was the show?" Laura replied "It was so cool!" I, still sobbing, replied "It was the end of my career…"

I will never get over this loss.

Authors Note: My second attempt at a story! Please note that this story is based on Fruits Basket. Fruits Basket is one of my FAVORITE manga! If you have not read it I suggest you do! And also, when I say "Master" I am speaking of my real life Japanese Jiu Jitsu Master. We are very close, and I am especially close to Laura, her real life granddaughter. I really wanted to throw them in there, so here we go! Once again, I hope you enjoyed it and I look forward to feedback!

Oh, by the way, I was never forced to go to a Sesame Street show. Thank the Lord. sweatdrop


End file.
